A Little Encouragement
January 21, 2010
I had the pleasure of watching my husband's nephew in a wrestling tournament yesterday. Up until this point, I had always thought wrestling was a matter of pinning the 'other guy' to the ground for a matter of seconds until you win, which it kind of is, but there's a lot more to it than just body slamming.
At one point in time during the matches, I paused to watch the coaches, as they instructed their students in each match. What surprised me was the difference between the coaching methods that the coaches provided. There seemed to be two different types of coaches.....one was encouraging, and the other was demanding.
The demanding coaches were full of demands (Do this! Do that!) followed by a few profanities if the student didn't listen as told. A foot might be stomped, or their eyes would roll as they lost all hope for the student they were coaching.
The encouraging coaches were completely different. They were yelling, Good job! Hold it for a little bit longer! That's right...you're doing it!! Even when the student was obviously losing, they remained positive for the student, and offered pats on the back during round breaks, hugs and more words of encouragement.
What I also came to learn was the impact of the 'positive' coaching versus the 'negative' coaching. Out of 17 rounds (yes, I counted to get stats) 14 of the 'encouraging coaches' students won their match. Only three of the 'demanding' coaches students won the match.
Being a life coach, I know the power of positive encouragement, about believing the best can happen in every scenario, no matter how it may look. I can not imagine myself yelling at my own clients, and cursing them when they make a mistake....it would be unethical in my books.
However, this rings true for everything in life. Whether it's with your partner, with your family members, or with yourself.....negative feedback promotes self defeat. Positive, encouraging feedback promotes rising above and beyond.
When you're talking to yourself about a situation in your life...are you a demanding coach, or are you an encouraging one? Do you believe you can do something before you've gotten started, or do put yourself in for failure before you've started.
Become aware of your own coaching power. Notice how you speak to yourself and to others. If you're being negative, try to change your wording...offer words of assurance, inspiration and encouragement. With it you have a 14-17 ratio of getting what you want.... and those are pretty great odds!
Until next time,
Catherine
At one point in time during the matches, I paused to watch the coaches, as they instructed their students in each match. What surprised me was the difference between the coaching methods that the coaches provided. There seemed to be two different types of coaches.....one was encouraging, and the other was demanding.
The demanding coaches were full of demands (Do this! Do that!) followed by a few profanities if the student didn't listen as told. A foot might be stomped, or their eyes would roll as they lost all hope for the student they were coaching.
The encouraging coaches were completely different. They were yelling, Good job! Hold it for a little bit longer! That's right...you're doing it!! Even when the student was obviously losing, they remained positive for the student, and offered pats on the back during round breaks, hugs and more words of encouragement.
What I also came to learn was the impact of the 'positive' coaching versus the 'negative' coaching. Out of 17 rounds (yes, I counted to get stats) 14 of the 'encouraging coaches' students won their match. Only three of the 'demanding' coaches students won the match.
Being a life coach, I know the power of positive encouragement, about believing the best can happen in every scenario, no matter how it may look. I can not imagine myself yelling at my own clients, and cursing them when they make a mistake....it would be unethical in my books.
However, this rings true for everything in life. Whether it's with your partner, with your family members, or with yourself.....negative feedback promotes self defeat. Positive, encouraging feedback promotes rising above and beyond.
When you're talking to yourself about a situation in your life...are you a demanding coach, or are you an encouraging one? Do you believe you can do something before you've gotten started, or do put yourself in for failure before you've started.
Become aware of your own coaching power. Notice how you speak to yourself and to others. If you're being negative, try to change your wording...offer words of assurance, inspiration and encouragement. With it you have a 14-17 ratio of getting what you want.... and those are pretty great odds!
Until next time,
Catherine
Posted by Catherine Graham. Posted In : Coaching
